Career Services

Here's young Zola at her school, considering her options. Zola is getting to the age where she's starting to think about an eventual career. So far, here are the potential jobs she's investigating:



1. Engineer. Not mechanical, civil, aerospace, or environmental. But a driver of trains. Choo-choo!


2. Baker. It's a little difficult to find jobs at the topless bakery, the threat of burns being what it is, but she's still hopeful. (Zola is frosting Halloween sugar cookies.)



3. Keymaster / Doorkeeper. Just in case Gozar the Gozarian needs entry into our dimension.



4. Professional Football Player. I'm sure even the great Johnny Unitas (pictured below Z.) threw a pass or two with his eyes closed (note: this was Zola's natural pose. We just told her to throw the ball. She's a natural.).





She tends to fumble under pressure, but she can lay the wood on D.
(If you listen carefully, you can hear her ask, "Are you okay, Daddy?" right after Dirk tackles her.)




5. Farmer.








6. Shepherd.



7. Drummer in a Rock Band.




8. Professional Bluegrass Dancer




9. Carnie. As a carnie, Zola could (1) see the world, (2) meet lots of people, (3) not have to worry about dental hygiene, (4) ride all the rides for free. What's not to love about this career?

(Note the classic carnie operating the train, and the tremendous front-butt in the background. This photograph speaks to all of us on so many levels.)







Personally, I'm pulling for #9.